NT Scan That Wasn't

We went for our NT scan today. This procedure is new to me because when I was pregnant with Kai we skipped the first trimester screening altogether and went straight to doing the amniocentesis. Back then I wasn't hesitant about the risk of amnio. I was a blissful, naive first-time mother-to-be who thought everything was just routine procedure and that there was nothing to worry about.

Of course, things are different now with this pregnancy. I'm more cautious, more fearful. Everything needs to be scrutinized and thoroughly thought through before giving our consent. Anyway, the new OB practice we transferred to advised us to take the screening first before we decide on doing a more invasive diagnostic test. So here we are doing everything by the book.

We got to the clinic really early. It's the same clinic I went to for my postpartum checkup after giving birth to Kai. I was immediately flooded by memories about that visit. The spacious, nicely decorated waiting room was filled with pregnant women as we waited our turn. It was tough sitting there and feeling my own belly flat and empty. Outside, it was too bright and sunshiny. I felt like throwing up. It was the last place I wanted to be.

And yet, there we were again but this time with another baby underway. Talk about going back full circle. We didn't choose this practice for my prenatal care but the new OB clinic we have now uses them for these kinds of procedure. So we found ourselves going back to that familiar waiting room.

Good thing it was early enough and there weren't a lot of pregnant women there. I was a bit nervous. Even though we just had an ultrasound last week and saw The Little Bug and his/her heartbeat when we met our CNM, I was still plagued by the thought that the Bug has died and that we would find out today. (I know, not a healthy state-of-mind to be in but it just worms its way in my mind sometimes. I think to a babyloss mother, a subsequent pregnancy is a nerve-wracking experience.)

We were called in but we had to wait again for a couple of minutes for the sonographer. Man, my nerves were getting the best of me and the more we wait, the more I got rattled. Dave had to make me laugh to distract me. "You should practice saying om, om," he said as he put his hands out like a yogi with thumb and index fingers touching.

It momentarily calmed me. "Look at it this way, we get to see the baby again. That would be awesome," he said rather jovially. I love my husband's optimism. He's better at putting his emotions in check and not let worry overtake him first without any logical reason. I'm so thankful that he is with me in every appointment for The Little Bug as he did during my pregnancy with Kai. It helps a lot to have a more rational person with me to counterbalance the emotional me during these visits.

The sonographer finally came in and proceeded to do the ultrasound. I felt relieved to see The Little Bug moving on the screen. But I couldn't help blurt out, "Can we hear the heartbeat?" to which the sonographer willingly oblige. The visual and the sound gave me the peace of mind I needed to get through the whole thing.

The sonographer talked us through what he was doing: "That's the top of the head. I'll get its measurement. Then that's the heart. See it has four chambers. That's the spine, the stomach, the kidney, the bladder..." Between his show-and-tell, I would ask questions. I asked if we could see the neural tubes with this scan and he replied those could only be seen in the detailed ultrasound I'm going to have later in the second trimester.

He showed the umbilical cord and I asked if it was a 2-vessel or a 3-vessel cord. He asked if I was concerned about it and I said, "No. I just want to know if the cord's structure is a normal 3-vessel one." He switched the screen to look like it was detecting heat signatures or blood flow and enthusiastically pointed out that there are indeed 3-vessels on the cord.

After he was done checking every inch of The Little Bug and getting measurements, I asked the placement of my placenta. He said it was low lying but it will eventually move up as I get farther along with my pregnancy. And then it was his turn to ask me a question: "Um, are you from a medical profession?"

I was a bit amused. I guess not so many pregnant women ask specific questions like I did during their NT scans. Ah if he only knew my history. If he only knew that the only thing I have control over this next pregnancy is information. And that I try to learn and understand as much as I can even if I know deep in my heart that this knowledge won't stop any bad thing from happening. But I educate myself anyway.

So I replied truthfully: "Nope. I just read a lot." He seemed satisfied with my answer and just gave me a nod and a smile. Before he left, he handed us a long sheet of The Little Bug's ultrasound pictures. Wow! I've never seen so much ultrasound pics and that made me smile. I joked about it to Dave, "It reminds me of those token-operated game in the arcade where it spits out long tickets after you won certain points and go to a counter to redeem them for a prize."

I really wanted to add: "If only it's the same with this pregnancy. After we reached 9 months, we go to a hospital and redeem them for a live and healthy baby." But I didn't want to ruin a good ultrasound session so I kept the thought to myself. How I wish it was really that simple.

After a few minutes of waiting again, the doctor came in and told us that The Little Bug is way too big for the nuchal translucency to be done. Apparently, I'm measuring one week ahead! And here I was counting the weeks until I reached the second trimester only to find out that I'm already on it. The Bug's gestational age is 14 weeks instead of the 13 weeks the OB predicted. So technically, we are no longer qualified for the NT scan program (which should have been done between 10 to 13 weeks).

Dave and I were both a bit disappointed not to have the nuchal translucency done because that's data we won't have on hand when we decide whether to go for an amnio or not. Usually in this program, the doctors combine the results of the first trimester blood test and the NT scan to gauge the risk of chromosomal abnormality with the baby. But now, we could only rely on the second trimester blood test and perhaps the detailed ultrasound later.

I'm not comfortable with little data to look at especially when we want to make an informed decision. I may just be over-worrying but I hope our OB can help us understand things better. While we didn't have any qualms going for an amnio during my pregnancy with Kai, in this subsequent pregnancy we want to minimize the risk if we can help it. But if not, we'd like to make sure that what we decide on is really for the best.

Just two of the long sheet of ultrasound pics we were given during this scan.